Shitty Monday..

What a Monday... it's only 11 am, and I am exhuasted... nothing seems to be right... The last weekend was so boring and bored, stayed at home and watched TV all the while.. Soon I will become sofa potato..

Val called on Sat, and said she bumped into him. So What? I should have brushed it off already, right? But why am I still so bothered about the things she told me? Why it will still affect me... I should be strong enough by now, but why am I still so miseable? I need to portray to the world the person I want them to see.. pretend that everything is ok... but I am getting very tired..

I never thought I will give up
But I can stand no more
Everything is letting me down
And I have no control
I don’t know where I have been
It seems like I just got the rules
Like I have been dreaming all the time
And only now I realize the truth
Should I return to my dreams
Or should I continue to play the games?
But how can I be someone else?
I am so lost that I pretend
That if I close my eyes and count to ten
Everything will be ok
And I will have my life again

幸福

Recently I am hooked on this album by 黃思婷. It's more like a spiritual album, but the songs are very soothing...When I am in a lousy mood, or when feeling lonely, I will have this album playing, it really helps.. I especially like one of the song inside, the lyrics is very meaningful, as Someone has been telling me all the while... 施比受更有福，付出就是一种幸福。

纵然俯看茫茫人世中，
多少纷纷扰扰失落的眼神，
漂泊的灵魂与无助的身影，
深深刻刻印在我心中，
不愿看见困惑与悲伤，
牵手走出黑暗太阳不西沉，
明天复明天希望却何其多，
得失只是一种过程。

站在世上最高之巅，
潜进海里最深之源，
终於明白人世间，
施比受更有福，
付出就是一种幸福。

用爱走出人生的路，
关怀身边每一个人，
今后回顾这一生，
我不枉费此生，
潇洒踏步不带尘土。

http://www.youmaker.com/video/sa?id=5e0f4e3e01cb48ce8622473bb89c8c8b001

Happy 18th Birthday...

Happy Birthday to you...
Happy Birthday to you..
Happy Birthday my baby...
Happy Birthday to you...

Today is my little baby's 18th birthday... We had a little BBQ party for her last night, but it started to rain before we have anything to eat... Moved everything upstairs, so we have a little buffet party instead... It was fun running in the rain, I think... and I hope she and her friends had great fun too...

I know 18 years old is a legal age for some stuff... but no matter what, you must always think carefully before you do it... Some things once done, are not able to reverse, to delete, or turn back... Everything you do now, will reflect on your life later, so do not think of now, but also your future, your life ahead... As I have told you, when you are 18, 28, 38, 48 or 58, you are always and will be always my baby... a never grown up baby...

I just want you to be happy always, and I am always here for you... I wish I can give you everything you need in life, every love you need... Mummy will always love you... Stay sweet and happy always...